Yeah, yeah...I know, I haven't posted in over a month. I haven't had anything to say, or more accurately, I haven't had anything I felt like writing about. It was a combo of a winter "funk" and a vast expansion in my sales territory, which is a good thing (hell ANY job is a good thing these days), but it means a lot more work.
Anyway, my future. The girl pictured above is the Swede's niece. Her 15 YEAR OLD NIECE! The one that my daughter looks just like. LOOK AT HER!! I have offered to help her father build the moat, and I have begun to consider building a bunker to keep the Monkey in during her teens...sigh.
OK, so I promised a scary Me/Monkey story, but I'm not liking what I am writing, so it will have to wait. Instead, there is a thing floating around Facebook I love...25 Random Things About Me. So I am posting my 25 things here (a few are TMI, but Hell that's what the blog is for!), and tagging a few of you, 'cause I am dying to read what you say about yourselves.
1) My kids answered any questions I ever had about my purpose in the universe. 2) I'm 38, and still struggle with issues my parent’s insanity caused when I was a kid. 3) #2 pisses me off...every time. 4) I watch too much TV. 5) You know that fantasy all men have? Yep, I've done that. 6) I started smoking again 4 months ago. I know I have to quit, but damn I love smoking. 7) I respect loyalty above all other qualities. 8) I'm not as tough as everyone thinks I am. 9) I'm tougher than I think I am. 10) Someone once described me as an Egomaniac with an Inferiority Complex...that's about right. 11) If my wife made more money, I would gladly be a stay-at-home Dad. 12) People without a sense of humor are like my Kryptonite; I have no powers around them. 13) I don't no what I did in a former life, but Karma had to have been responsible for my wife...and yes, I mean that in a good way. 14) I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. 15) I'm jealous of people who know the answer to #14. 16) I have a permit to carry a gun, and I almost always do. 17) I am a good Dad, and prouder of that than anything else I have ever done. 18) I'm afraid of flying. Oh, I'll do it, but it scares the shit out me...VooDoo, I think it's VooDoo that holds the damn things up. 19) I tell everyone I am 6'2", but I'm actually only 6'1 1/2". 20) I have never changed the oil in my own car. 21) I can't pass "The Magnificent Seven" or "The Dirty Dozen" on TV without watching them to the end. 22) I haven't lived in a house without a dog or cat since 1995. 23) I hate going to the movies. 24) If I didn't have coffee for a day, I would take a human life. 25) My wife kicks my ass every time we play golf together...and I think it's kinda' sexy.
Alright, enough already. The poor dog has been with us since Thursday, and we can't land on a name. So you, dear readers (all five of you), will be making the final decision. Each of the "voting" members of our household have a name we like best...you guys can be the tiebreaker.
"Turn this Dog Whisperer crap off!"
I've no idea how long we will wait to get a good representation, but I'll let you know when "Dumbass" has a name. (Yes...I tried...the Swede won't let me name him "Dumbass".)
This is our new dog, as of yesterday. He is from a local shelter that saved him from a "kill" shelter in the Carolina's. No, we don't know what he is either... He's about 10 weeks old.
Oh, and yes, that IS a huge tear in the couch to the right of the Monkey and sleeping "dog" (we haven't landed on a name yet)...Monkey made it by pulling a string when she was a baby. *sigh* Everything we own is, or has become, crap...
So, we are gladly taking name suggestions...we need something to yell just in front of the "NO!".
I'm an ex-Military Cop that joined the corporate world by mistake. I was told once that I look like a guy that comes to find you when you owe your bookie money. The truth? I'm an M&M, hard shell, soft insides. If you really want to know me, look at the pictures...those two and their Mom...that's my life. That's why I'm here.