Monday, October 27, 2008

Its A Boy!!

So, for the past year, since the birth of Scratch, I have had innumerable people say something like, "I bet you're happy it's a boy, huh Dad?". As if, somehow the Monkey was less than perfect for me, because she was a girl. Like I longed for the day the Swede would bear me an heir. This is for them...

First of all, my four-year old girl will kick the ass of your four-year old boy...hell, I'd put my money on her if your kid is younger than seven. Since she was able to crawl she has loved to wrestle with me. I am 6'2" and go about 240, she doesn't, nor has she ever, but she loves to bang heads on the floor. She knew how to turn her hips and shoulder into a straight right-hand, behind a left jab since she was two.

The Monkey gets hurt...a lot. She likes to run and jump, and doesn't always look where she is going or correctly ascertain the height of what she is jumping from. She rarely cries when she gets hurt. We usually find out what happened when we notice the bruises at bath time. If she is crying after a fall...she is HURT.

The Monkey loves to fish with me, or her uncle, or her grandfather. She has loved to go out in the boat since she was about 2 1/2. She handles worms, she picks out her own minnow, and she reels in her own fish before asking, "Can I touch it?" She has already asked if she can come hunting with me someday...

The Monkey loves bugs, toads, construction sites, Barbie, and Disney Princesses. If they made a "Back-Hoe Barbie", the Monkey's head would explode. She asked for a Remote-Controlled car for her birthday, after she saw one near her favorite playground.

Scratch is a boy. He makes a one-year old version of "Vroom-Vroom" when he pushes anything with wheels. He enjoys head butting things, people, pets, and occasionally the wall. He also likes to put his head on my shoulder when I rock him before bed. Then he puts his arm over my shoulder, and rubs my cheek with his little hand. Every time, it makes me love him a little more.

So no, jackasses, I wasn't "relieved" or "thrilled" Scratch was a boy. I was, both of those things, that he was healthy. You see, I expose my kids to the things I love AND things I don't know jack about. I don't decide, beforehand, if it is a Girl thing or a macho Boy thing. If Scratch had been a girl, she would have gone fishing too, AND she would totally be able to kick your little boy's ass...

12 comments:

Laggin said...

And as made clear by my post yesterday, I don't miss having a boy...at all!!!

miko564 said...

laggin- I think it's going to be interesting. You can already tell the little guy has a temper, but he also is a "cuddle-monster" just like his sister. (and parents too)

-k said...

I saw a bumper sticker once that said "My daughter can kick your son's ass..." I'll see if I can find it for you.

cIII said...

Someone asked me, after the Tater was born..."Are you gonna try again, for a Boy?"

As if it's some Midway game.

I headbutted them in the Snout.

Swine.

DCD said...

When my Mom was pregnant someone asked my Dad if he was hoping for a boy. My Grandfather happened to be there and he immediately piped up with, "You can take a girl fishing just as well as a boy."

Since Maggie is already copying all of the Punk Ass's karate moves, I think she will be right in line to kick some butt if necessary!

miko564 said...

K- I'll take it and hang it on her bedroom door!

Ciii- "Try Again"?! Like, not only is it a Midway game, but that you didn't win on the first try. If you see him again, give him another from me...

DCD- Go Mags! Plus, getting beat on by an older brother, her whole life, should toughen' her up some.

Um...I respect your Grandfathers sentiment...but...have you ever been fishing? For that matter, has your brother?

DCD said...

Ha! I can't speak for Jeff, but my Dad and I spent many an afternoon racing for the dingy when the bluefish were running!

DCD said...

I should point out that the fishing with my Dad took place within the last 10 years. So as a kid? No.

miko564 said...

DCD, that makes it even cooler!

See, I was bustin' your chops, and you come up with a nice memory...way to shut me down!

Carolyn...Online said...

I've never understood people who act like girls are a consolation prize.

And WHY wasn't I informed the moment you started a blog for god's sake? I feel a tad behind the times.

miko564 said...

Carolyn, true confession time. I've been carrying a grudge for a week, because you haven't posted a comment here. Like the dog when I walk by the door and don't let her out.

I assumed (yes I know what happens when I assume) that you knew I was here, causing problems. Sorry.

As soon as I get a hold of her, I am TOTALLY gonna' have the VooDoo lady lift the curse. Until then, you may not want to leave the house...

bernthis said...

Your monkey and my monkey were separated at birth. My daughter has the highest pain tolerance of anyone I know and I'm positive she could kick any boy's ass under 8 as well. Loved your post.